How Resentment Works

Resentment is one of the most important elements of our interior world relevant to our practice. With sustained practice, it is possible to experience resentment-free states of consciousness. Resentment is one of the most important elements of our interio world relevant to our practice. With sustained practice, it is possible to experience resentment-free states of consciousness. Once we find that this is possible—even if initially unstable—our attention will naturally turn toward reverse-engineering how a resentment-free way of being even came about, and how we can stabilize it. For this, we need to see how resentment works in some detail.

The dictionary definition of resentment is “bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly.” In Eros, this is only one way resentment can show up. Some other ways include heavy emotionalism, fragility, withdrawal, or confusion. Resentment shows up in all these ways, because they signal a lack of available attention for what is happening now.

Resentment can only be experienced by passive attention. It occurs at the moment the tumescent mind locks down and then begins to act as a dam, collecting experiences that hold a similar charge, like a magnet, until enough moments in time have accumulated.

Resentment never dissolves of its own accord. Unless we discharge the central energy of resentment, it will continue to build.

Resentment is the water most people swim in—a background feeling of discontent that we either grow accustomed to or convince ourselves will disappear on its own. Or worse, convince ourselves it can be concealed.

This is the best we can hope for in an unnatural world. If we had a world of cars with no trees, we would simply find ways to live in pollution and smog in the same way we have learned to live in the smog of resentment.

If utilized well, one can use Eros to convert resentment. Eros says that not only do we not have a right, but our refusal to allow our smog to be converted is harmful to ourselves and others.